Wedding Details: do they ever stop multiplying and how do I stay sane while I plan my wedding ?

You’re engaged !  Congratulations !!  This is a very exciting time in your life.  Exciting and fun and a bit overwhelming.  There are so many wedding details and once you think you’ve gotten a handle on all of it, you speak to someone else and little seeds of doubt creep into your head: do I really have it all down ?  There are things you can do to keep you relaxed, calm and peaceful.

Here are the top 9 ways to keep you calm and organized as you plan one of the most important days in your life.

  • Take a deep breath and focus on the task at hand: as great as you may be at multi-tasking, you really can only do one thing at a time well.  When things start to get overwhelming, breathe deep, take a look at your options and focus on the most pressing one.  It may be different than what you were working on or had in mind and that’s ok.
  • Keeping your focus: keep a notebook near you or use your notebook app to jot down the myriad of thoughts that distract you from the task at hand.  This will help you to focus and give you peace that you won’t be forgetting something else important.
  • Make a quick hit list: when the multitude of details begin to cloud your thinking and you begin to think that you can’t possibly fit everything in to your planning timeline, break it down into smaller bites.  Plan for a smaller list of details to cover each month.  Look for a planning timeline online or consult with a wedding planner.  Knowing that you have all of the details down on paper and scheduled properly can give you great peace of mind.
  • Reducing Stress: if you find yourself getting stressed, talk with a friend or call your wedding planner.  It’s great to get a different perspective and encouragement from those who love you and those who have the expertise.  Keep an open mind and allow yourself the freedom to change your mind if a better solution presents itself.
  • Positivity: surround yourself with positive people.  Similar to the point above, this is one of the best times in your life to keep focused on the positive and the possibilities.  People who are negative or who are seeking their own way will bring you down.  This is the time to look at your future and keep people around you who want your true happiness.
  • Vendor Specifics: when considering working with any vendor, read their contract thoroughly, make note of the specifics and ask questions if anything isn’t clear.  Be sure that you are comfortable with their stipulations, policies and procedures.  If something doesn’t fit in with what you originally had in mind, decide now if it is a deal breaker or if it something you are willing to compromise on.   Be sure to step back and look at the whole picture.  Each time you decide on a vendor, remember you are one step closer to checking everything off of your list.  
  • Possibilities: you don’t have to do a wedding a specific way, unless you want to.  Follow tradition if it’s important to you, but remember that this day should be all about the two of you coming together and your guests should leave feeling like they saw who you are and what you like.  These days anything is possible.  Decide what you both like, and what makes you most comfortable and happy.
  • Wedding Style: with so many options available to a wedding couple, sometimes you can get overwhelmed with the possibilities or you worry that while you are happy with your decision on something today, tomorrow you may find a better option.  You could plan forever, but then you won’t end up enjoying one of the best days of your life.  This is where style definition comes into play.  One of the best ways to define your style is to look at pictures of various elements of a wedding: flowers, dresses, suits/tuxes, decor, lighting, the cake, etc.  Pinterest is a great tool that can help you narrow down the possibilities.  Once you start pinning all of the pictures that make you happy, take a step back and look at your selections.  You will start to see some consistency.  Make note of 5 to 7 words that describe your style.  These can then be the basis as you make decisions on all of the elements you include in your wedding.  Moving forward, if you have a question about whether something is right for your wedding you can go back to these words and decide if it fits in.

Remember, at the end of the day you will be married to the one that you love and the one who loves you: deeply, completely and unconditionally.  No matter what elements you put into your day or if something doesn’t turn out as you saw it in your head, when the ceremony and reception are over, you will fall asleep with the love of your life by your side, wake up to a new day and start your new life together.  Take joy in this and savor the moments that bring you the most joy during the planning process.